405th Rp Critique

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BlacRoseImmortal said:
I loved that last entry Lee. I actually didnt expect Eerie to die like that... but it was very noble and awesome. RIP Eerie :]
Thank you, Thank you, too kind. I really appreciate it.
It's weird but even thought I only wrote about him for a short while it was kind of hard to write his ending. However, I just couldn't write this story and not put anything moving or dramatic in it. I feel like it was an ending fit for him.
 
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I agree. I'm surprised you killed you main character, but you did it quite well. Very nice! (I've been thinking of using the spiker manuever in prior parts of my story, but now you took it!)

I have a post ready to go.

Waiting on you, Assassin!

And I agree, should be BRI.
 
Looks like we are heading into the final stages of the story, everyone knows what to do when uve completed your part let me know
 
leegrisham said:
What happened to that guys post, there was a new entry in there and now its gone.

You mean beowulf? All he did was say, "Adam I'm going to rip your eyes out and shove them up your @$$ and then I'm going to steel your costume. I $#!t on MC!" Then he was added to the banned group, renamed "Cry Baby Elite" instead of "Member" and was granted -900 posts. The end.

Check it out for yourself.
http://405th.com/forums/index.php?showuser=2565
 
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Yeah, Adam ended that guy. That should be an example for anyone who wants to bad mouth God, too.
 
He made his post just a bit to late in the RP for anything to make sense and took over my character for a little bit, which is bad, so me and Assassin sent him PMs asking him to stop.

He agreed, deleted his post, and hopes he can partake in the next RP, which is cool.
 
Yeah I did add a post in (reading most of the story before posting). Unfortuantly I came in too late, so I ended up deleting it. I do hope to partake in the next RP, since this one was so kick ass. Hopefully, by then I will have improved my RP writing skills.

Here's what that post contained:

- Time for my entrance -

The Spartan COM sounded, "Unknown Aircraft Inbound. Just came out of slip space. ETA 2 minutes. Damn this thing is moving fast!"
"Get me varification on that craft." Justin said.
"Unknown Aircraft, we require your identification. No responce indicates enemy vessel. You have 30 seconds."
........
"This is Spartan-074, looks like you need some help down there."
"God another Spartan ..."
"I'm not just another Spartan, soilder. I'll be landing in 40 seconds. I want a full breifing when I get there."
"Yes, sir."
Exactly 40 seconds later, the craft landed. It was larger than the Hornet, but more compact than a Pelican. It hovered slightly above the ground for a few moments, before the polit opened the cockpit. The polit stood ruffly 6 feet tall, and carried a modified long ranged weapon with a shotgun straped to his back. His armor was a custom build of the Mark V suit. He walked over to the closest Marine.
"Man, I cannot leave this sector for one moment without something getting blown up."
"Sir, we have a problem."
"Of course you do. Let me guess ... does it involve a huge mass of the Flood, with an infected SPARTAN at the lead."
"How did you ..."
Spartan 074 fired a sniper round off right over the Marine's shoulder. Shocked, the Marine stubles around to see a large army of the Flood approaching.
"Just a guess. Oh and if I where you, I would get every non-SPARTAN out of here ... NOW!!

The vehicle I came in on was a vechile I am working on for Halo CE. It is basicly a modified Hornet/Kestral. Here is a consept drawing:

EagleVehicalOverview.png


Anyway, I hope to partake in the next RP. How will you all be deciding on where to set it and such?
 
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We are discussing it internally at the moment. It should be announced on the final post of the first RP and the first post of the second RP.
 
leegrisham said:
Yeah I am totally looking forward to the next RP hopefully we can get some new blood in here.
Hint taken. I may get involved in the next RP if the opportunity is right and the story is there. Heck, I'm still catching up on this RP. I can never seem to sit and read the thing all the way through. What I have read is pretty good, though.
 
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My last post is a painful one. It was the only way I could hint a sequel in an ominous way. BRI should feel loved, though. Hope you guys enjoy it.
 
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